You know you're getting older when...
Everything that works hurts, and what doesn't hurt doesn't work.
You feel like the morning after, and you haven't been anywhere.
Your little black book only contains names ending in M.D.
Your children are beginning to look middle-aged.
Your mind makes contracts your body can't keep.
You look forward to a dull evening.
Your knees buckle and your belt won't.
Your back goes out more than you do.
You sink your teeth into a steak, and they stay there.
You know all the answers, but nobody asks the questions.
It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired.
The twinkle in your eye is only the reflection of the sun on your bifocals.
The pharmacist has become your new best friend.
You confuse having a clear conscience with having a bad memory.
You give up all your bad habits and you still don't feel good.
You go from hoping for a BMW to hoping for a BM.
You have more patience, but it's actually that you just don't care anymore.
You have more hair growing out of your ears than you have on your head.
You move something to a more logical location and then can only remember where it used to be.
You wake up just in time to go to bed...
You finally find something you've been looking for, for ages but can't remember why you wanted it.
You can't finish a conversation, because you don't remember what you were talking about.
Your spare tire is larger than your car's.
You are declined as an organ donor - you're told they're not sure if your organs are functional.
You reach the toilet but you forgot what you wanted to do.
You had to get rid of your dog he kept trying to drag you to the yard to bury you.
You try to donate to a sperm bank but they insist they require live specimens.
A passing funeral procession pauses to see if you need a lift.
Children often innocently ask you, "What did people do before electricity?" And you can't remember.
You discover the meaning of life, but forgot to write it down.
Everyone is happy to give you a ride because they don't want you behind the wheel.
(ps.. I LOVE this!!!) :lmao:
You discover, yet again, that framed photo of your grand parent on the wall is really a mirror.
LOL :emolaugh: I looked at my son yesterday and thought I was looking in a mirror....Then I looked in the mirror and cried.... : :( : I got old! :giveup:
Yup.. I have one of those "earlier versions" of myself running around the house too. I had forgotten for a while that I was excessively large and imposing. Oh well... I'm learning that once upon a time I was handsome. Of course, now I look more like something out of the Thriller video but it's kinda hard to argue with time.
Luckily I am still stronger than mini me... LOL :insane: