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Seriously? it just gets better and better.

Started by Hollywood, May 22, 2017, 08:26:59 PM

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Hollywood

My mind wanted to do things my illness didn't want to do. I tried walking, the first was 8 pain in my feet, so bad I was limping but I figured it would go away. NOT. So after about 5 minutes I started praying that I could just make it back home. I knew if I sat down I would never get back up. My back also kicked in and was an 8.5 pain and rising with each step. Well I made it home. But then the depression and Anger kicks in because of how screwed up my body is. And I have a Pain pump that supposedly puts pain medicine right in my spine. I swear if I knew what I knew now I would have never gotten the pump. It was supposed to be the answer-, like life changing. BS. Taking meds is better. But can't do that anymore because of all the stupid new laws. I almost died because i couldn't fill a legit Rx.
So I figure I will go to the apt pool after some rest and try to stretch, that usually helps my back pain. The more limber I am the less I hurt. So I spent 10 minutes in the pool trying to stretch out the kinks.
   Then I came  upstairs and arshole was home. So I laid down to watch TV and the next thing i know my son is waking me up for dinner. I fell asleep for about 2 hours.  So while im trying to eat dinner, idiot is in the room bugging Julie my wife about something, so i tell him just forget it and get out , let Mom eat. God he's an idiot.
   I'm trying not to let him ruin  my dinner but i'm getting pissed. You know he went to his pain Doctor, then the pharmacy and who knows where else by taking the BUS! If he is so disabled how does he even walk to the bus stop which is a mile at least from where we live? And I can't walk around the parking lot.
   Then he starts his crap, asking me why I quit walking? And trying to goat me into an argument. because he walks all over. Then he has the balls to ask me " IF I EVEN HAD A DOCTOR DIAGNOSE ME WITH FIBRO?" I told him what did he think, I just applied for disability and they just gave it to me? "YES I HAVE HAD 4 DOCTORS TELL ME i HAVE FIBRO" his comment is how do they know because there's no test for it. That was it , I told him to get out and let me eat my dinner and i guess he could see I was seconds from choking the life out of him so he left. I hate my life right now. But it is going to change somehow. I can't live with this son of a bitch.
Stephen Michael Dirse

db

Ugg to all this. : :( :

I have to keep in mind that even though I feel I am completely disabled, you only have to look around to see many people who are worse off.   :yikes:

I still can't help but complain at times because it is frustrating and painful......but, I know I got it better than many.   :giveup:

My home has been my safety zone.  I need it everyday.  In your case, life just doesn't seem fair.  : :( :

db

DEL

May the LORD grant you healing and comfort, Brother! Don't let the anger win. ::Amen:: :bighug:
"Today, you will be with me in paradise."

I have to be me; no one else wants the job!

Praise God and Pass the Ammo!

If only my Aunt had balls she'd be my Uncle!

foxgrove

:bighug:

Praying that you find a safe place to be where you are able to let yourself decompress and for endurance to continue to move forward and find joy in life no matter who is around you.  I know this really blows right now.  I take it there is really no way to financially survive without this guy staying with you...  We've discussed that before...  I'm praying for him as well that he'll come to see and feel remorse for causing you pain and have a change of heart about it all.

Just know that no matter how bad it gets, it's all a short term problem.  Gotcha in my thoughts. :budy:
Where God leads, His hand always provides
...so keep Calm and code on....

Foxgrove

denny

I KNEW IT WAS THE ALIENS!



"FREE ME FROM EXISTANCE"
It is what it is...

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